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Terlanjur Berpacaran Dan Suka Main 'Gituan' Dengan Pacar, Sekarang Ingin Bertaubat, Apakah Akan Diterima Taubat Saya ??

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Terlanjur Berpacaran Dan Suka Main 'Gituan' Dengan Pacar, Sekarang Ingin Bertaubat, Apakah Boleh ??



Assalamualaikum redaksi Kabarmakkah.com yang saya hormati, Perkenalkan saya seorang gadis berusia 16 Tahun, sejak beberapa waktu yang lalu saya mempunyai pacar, dan kami sama-sama suka melakukan hal-hal yang menjurus ke arah perzinaan, Namun kami belum pernah melakukan perbuatan zina tersebut.

Namun kami sudah berjanji akan menikah dan membangun keluarga yang sakinah mawaddah warahmah. Namun ada pertanyaan mengganjal dalam pikiran saya, apakah mungkin keluarga sakinah akan terwujud, jika sejak awal hubungan kami ini sudah tidak islami (melalui berpacaran tersebut)?


Jawaban:

Waalaikumsalam warahmatullah wabarakatuh,

Saudara penanya yang dirahmati Allah, Alhamdulillah di antara maraknya pergaulan bebas antara Muslim dan Muslimah yang tak lagi mengenal batas kebenaran, ternyata Anda tergolong mereka yang mendapat cahaya hidayah Allah SWT.

Selama ini pemahaman Anda yang benar terhadap pergaulan yang dituntunkan Islam baru sebatas teori, akan tetapi ini pun sudah pantas untuk disyukuri. Dalam masalah yang membelit Anda, kesalahan itu terletak pada proses pacaran, di mana seorang muslim bergaul di luar batas tuntutan syariat dengan muslimah yang bukan mahramnya. Sementara tumbuhnya rasa cinta kepada muslimah itu bukanlah kesalahan. Sesungguhnya tumbuhnya kasih antara dua manusia berlainan jenis adalah salah satu karunia Allah SWT.

Dalam firman-Nya berikut ini:

“Dan di antara tanda-tanda kekuasaannya adalah Dia ciptakan untukmu istri-istri dari jenismu sendiri, supaya kamu kamu cenderung dan merasa tentram kepadanya, dan dijadikan-Nya di antaramu rasa kasih sayang.” (QS. Ar-Rum [30]:21)
Nah, yang perlu dihindari adalah proses yang keliru tadi. Dan manakala seorang ingin bertaubat dari kesalahan yang ia perbuat, maka yang harus segera ia lakukan adalah tidak mengulangi perbuatan yang dimurkai Allah tersebut.




Dengan kata lain, secepat mungkin Anda harus menghentikan cara pergaulan yang keliru, dan menggantinya dengan cara yang telah ditentukan oleh Islam. Upaya ini dibarengi dengan terus-menerus beristighfar memohon ampun kepada Allah SWT, agar dosa-dosa yang telah lalu diampuni, sehingga tak mengganggu perjalanan rumah tangga berikutnya.

Meskipun awal pergaulan Anda tidak islami namun masih ada waktu untuk memperbaikinya. Bukankah ampunan Allah untuk hamba-Nya senantiasa terbuka lebar?


Insya Allah, keluarga sakinah akan ada jika Anda bertaubat nashuha dan memperbaiki diri. Setiap orang memiliki prinsip hidup yang ia anut, maka akan terjadi konflik batin, seperti yang Anda rasakan, jika ada sesuatu yang tidak sesuai syariat. Selanjutnya konflik batin ini memberi pengaruh buruk kepada keseluruhan aktivitas kehidupan Anda. Itu sebabnya jika Anda menginginkan untuk segera memperbaiki kebaikan, segeralah memperbaiki konflik batin ini, dengan cara memperbaiki perilaku Anda agar sesuai dengan prinsip hidup Anda.

Terakhir untuk masalah jodoh ini kita harus tawakal kepada Allah karena hanya dia yang tahu siapa jodoh kita sebenarnya. Anda hanya bisa membangun hubungan dengan muslimah ‘teman akrab’ Anda, sementara Allah yang akan menentukan. Dan kadang kadang cara Allah menentukan pilihan-Nya di luar rasio kita sebagai manusia yang fana. Apakah ‘teman akrab’itu jodoh Anda ataukah orang yang sama sekali belum Anda kenal, semuanya adalah ketentuan Allah, Sang Maha Pencipta.

Maka, setelah Anda berusaha dan berdoa, terimalah ketentuan Allah dengan hati ikhlas, agar tidak terlalu sakit hati. Jika harus menerima kenyataan di luar kehendak Anda, maka jangan habis-habisan memberikan cinta kepada siapapun, melainkan kadar cinta kepada Allah masih harus lebih tinggi dari itu semua.


Selamat berjuang untuk memperbaiki diri. Kami doakan agar Anda mendapat kekuatan dan ketabahan iman dari Allah Subhanahu wa Ta’ala. Aamiin.
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